Wild-eyed and desperate, she walking toward me with a child on her hip. The kids hopped out of the car and ran full-throttle for the karate studio as she leaned into the open window, looked me square on and said, "I'm an absolute wreck. I saw online that you're going to do a 40 Day Sugar Fast and I just ate Reese's Peanut Butter Cups to get me through the rest of the afternoon. Just now, right before I walked up I popped a whole one into my mouth. I'm a wreck." She licked her fingers something fierce, then told me about the poop in her toddler's bathtub and food on the floor and toys all around and the crying (theirs and hers). "My son doesn't even take it personally when I yell anymore. He knows I'm a wreck." I asked if she would join me for the fast. Forty days without sugar. Forty days without running to food to get her through. Forty days of running hard to Jesus for His strength. Forty day not diving into the pantry, but diving headlong and needy into God's Word.
"Yeah, I probably should," she said, looking away. "I'm all over the place. I'm a wreck."
Mothering can do that. Marriage can do that. Work and balancing it all can do that. LIFE can do that. No doubt a diet coke can get you through till dinner, or a spoonful of Nutella as the kids play or have another timeout, or that steaming mug of vanilla creamer with a splash of coffee... whatever it takes. And it doesn't take much, just a Reese's peanut butter cup at 3 o'clock in the afternoon - every afternoon.
"I'm a Wreck." She said it with conviction and owned it as her identity - the sign she'd hung around her neck, then hung her head in shame.
Has negative self-talk named and claimed you?
Have you given up believing that you can be whole and hopeful, soft-hearted and soft-spoken again?
Maybe you've told yourself that you've screwed up too many times with the kids and with your husband and with God and with yourself. You've believed the lie with your own voice, "I've failed as a woman, as a mom, as a wife..." It's the inner-dialogue of your days, and so you slip away and grab another handful of chocolate chips to silence the conversation and make yourself feel better for a time. But the sugar lifts you up only to cause you to crash hard, just like it does your children. Reinforcing the message.
"I'm a wreck."
Do you have lies that you've bought into, lies that have become the lens through which you see yourself?
Well, today is Day 1 of our 40 Day Sugar Fast, and we aren't just fasting from sugar, we're choosing to replace what is not true with truth. Taking out the sugar, cleansing with water; starving out the lies, inserting true thoughts and words; ripping out angry responses, and speaking life to one another in our homes.
As we do, our testimony talk will change. Testimony talk is what we say out loud about what we believe - and each time we hear it the pathways in our brain go deeper in believing it. But guess what, those thoughts you believe can change! How you cope and how you eat can change. How you think and how you talk and how you love and how you parent and HOW YOU TESTIFY can change.
"I'm a wreck," becomes, "I'm a woman in need of Jesus."
"I can't do this," surrenders to, "with Christ all things are possible."
"I am hopeless" begins to hope again.
Here's some of the testimony talk I've received either face to face of in comments on the blog and Facebook these past days. People believe things, you see? Some true and some false. What will you believe about yourself and about the next forty days?
We are fasting from sugar, to reclaim the sweet truth of who we were made to be. Though life is full of challenges, we will not be bound by strong holds, not sugary crutches, bingeing to fill our hurting hearts, or alcohol to numb the pain. We are taking our emotions, our days, our marriages, our addictions, and our negative self-talk to the cross of Christ, because He came to give us life and life abundant that we might shine pure and bright and unencumbered for Him.
That's our testimony talk, shining bright in what we think and say and how we live.
You were made to let your light shine... If the sugar-induced depression, mood swings, explosive words and tears have darkened the light-shining life you were saved to lead, then join me for these next forty days. We are fasting from sugar, so that our bodies might stabilize. But this isn't just physical, this is holy. Light shining, testifying, child loving, husband loving, holy lives that don't need sugar to get us through our days. We need Jesus!
Therefore, as we take out the lies, let us insert scriptures that give us courage.
I am gathering a list of verses to remind us what is true when we are tempted to believe what is false in the days ahead. Tell me, what lies are you throwing down, here on Day One? And which scripture-truths are you choosing to replant and believe instead? Name and claim 'em in the comments below, because this isn't just about sugar, this is about setting things right, right now. Believing what is true.
We've got this!
We've got this, because He's got us!