When we're driving down the road and an old beater covered in bumper stickers pulls in front of us, my husband always says, "I bet no one listened to that man when he was in Jr. High." Then he looks at me, like it's a conversation starter. Truth is, he said the same thing last month on another road trip, so I just nod. But I'm laughing now as I type it out, because I do think it's an interesting perspective.
And I think lots of people blog for the same reason - this intense need to be part of the conversation. So they invite themselves to the party and stick bumperstickers to their cocktail dresses. "Listen to me, I've got something original to say!"
Now here I sit, past bedtime, typing out my opinions on things no one asked me about... and I have to say it's slightly awkward. Like throwing oneself out into the ether in a sticker-covered dress.
Beep Beep. Look at me!
And the weirdest part of all is that I'd rather stay quiet and keep my thoughts to myself, but they sort of bubble up and out like a natural geyser, with the earth's pressure pushing it so. Goodness, I hope what shoots heavenward is at least water and not hot air. More than water, Living Water, that's what I really want. Water flowing up and out and getting readers soaked through with the Living Water that Jesus promised would truly satisfy. Yeah, that's my ultimate hope. That's why I blog. Why I drive my old blue Datsun, the one with the sunroof stuck open, covered in Jesus Stickers, silver fish and crosses. Because I'm passionate about this water flowing in and through me.
I know that I have family and friends who aren't interested, probably the same ones that wouldn't choose to invite me to their intimate parties... but I've decided that's alright with me. It's going to have to be, because the natural push to communicate God's radical nearness in my everyday life is stronger than my need to please them.
There are, however, times I leave my car in the garage because it's exhausting. Not the writing or the speaking or the driving or the flowing, but the sharing on a soul level, how desperate I am for Jesus each day. I'd love to be the woman who writes posts like simple equations: "Three things you can do to have the life you've always wanted!" But I don't believe in formulas. I haven't found one yet that covers every disease but Christ. Every hurt but Christ. Every need but Christ. So when I do write, the bumpersticker summary is simply "Jesus."
Beep Beep. Look at Him.
Look at Him. Look at Him. I hope I'm wearing Him well. Not cutting you off, in my clunky car covered in His name. But I hope I'm a lovely reflection of Christ as I invite myself into your Living Room. Offering up the overflowing, outpouring of Living Water I just can't seem to stop.
I've got nothing to bring, nothing to share
But faith in the One who's present as air,
So I lift up my pen, and take up the dare;
Each morning, noon and night, like a prayer.
If you have nothing to bring but Jesus, you have enough. Though despised and rejected, you have enough. Because people are thirsty and desperate for the only thing that can ever truly satisfy.
Beep Beep. Look at Him.